I Have Been There

From the beginning of this pandemic, I have appreciated how fortunate I am.

I have a good husband. We have a healthy relationship. My husband and I are relatively financially secure – not wealthy by any means, but secure. We have food in our fridge, pantry and freezer. We have a supply of paper products, on hand from well before Covid-19 was a ‘situation’ in Canada. My children are all managing. Our grandchildren are secure. We have concerns over this pandemic, but we are okay.

At other times in my life this would not have been the case at all. I have been through an abusive dysfunctional marriage, I have lived paycheque to paycheque, my cupboards have been all but bare. I have been alone – with only people who depended on me. I have had major health issues. My father spent four months in hospital before dying of a cancer that ate at him for four years. My mother spent five years in a nursing home – frail, lonely and at times confused.

I have no idea how I would have had the strength to deal with this pandemic in the days when my life was more than I could deal with. I don’t know how I would have fed my family. I don’t know how or if I would have kept a roof over our heads. I don’t know how I would have dealt with the stress of a serious health risk on top of serious health issues. I don’t know how I would have dealt with knowing my parents were fragile, and helpless and alone. I just do not know.

My heart goes out to those who are going through personal challenges on top of dealing with this current pandemic. They are in my thoughts and prayers because I cannot imagine. I know how challenging life can be – because I have been there.🥀