Happy Mother’s Day

by annemariedemyen, posted in 2024, family

It is that time of year again, that time to honor mothers.  I generally post a tribute to my own mother on this day.  She has been gone for eleven years now but she is still very much in my thoughts – today and most every other day of the year.

Mom & family – Denise, Pete, Jeanne, Mom, Elaine, Me & Lorraine

However, despite my admiration for my mother’s dedication, determination, and efforts to keep us alive and in line to adulthood, my Mother’s Day post this year isn’t really about her. 🙄

This year my Mother’s Day post is about me and my life as a mother (and grandmother).

Me – as an aging mother and early years grandmother
My littles – Jennifer, Mark, and Daniel

Being the mother of infants, toddlers, and preschoolers was the greatest experience of my  life.   My littles were perfect, adorable, innocent wee souls.  As a bonus, I was  blessed with the endless strength and stamina to keep them fed and clothed, clean and happy.   AND  as if that was not bonus enough – I got  to prove that,  having learned from all of the mistakes that my own mother made raising me,  I  could and would do MUCH better raising mine.   

The years of elementary school were still pretty doable.  All three of my kids made it safely from one grade to the next.   I started working full-time,  I did everything I could to give my parents the help they needed when my father developed cancer and the four years of hell that entailed,  but my kids were always first and foremost.     Again, I kept them fed and clothed, cared for, and cleaned up after – as well as attending their concerts, school, and sporting events.    Go Mom!

My teens – Dan, Jennifer, (me), and Mark

With their early teen years, came major changes in our lives.    My father passed away and shortly thereafter I took my kids, our dog, and my favourite plant – precious little else – and moved across the city from their father.   The first year and a half we lived on a wish and a prayer. 

We lived in a lower level duplex (basement apartment if you want to get technical).  I started working two full time jobs.  My kids were great, as were their friends – a number of whom soon became regular members of our little family.  I kept them all fed, kept mine clothed and in school(s).  Three separate schools because they had very different preferences.  I saved and took us and my mother on a week’s vacation to a summer resort.   I bought a much newer and more reliable vehicle (A  shiny turbo charged Silver & Black convertible).   And I moved us into a true side by side duplex with a full finished basement, two bathrooms, and an amazing laundry room.   I bought our very own barbecue and lawnmower.  We had room to spare, which my kids filled with more of their friends – who I fed on a regular basis. 

My kids were fed, clothed, clean and happy!  I was THE MOM – the mom that full grown adults wished they had. 

Finally, I met and married Dan.  He loved me, he loved my family and he was, and is, there for all of us.

And then, all too soon,  my kids were all grown up.  They moved out, married, and had their own kids – adorable, affectionate, brilliant kids (who love me and adore Grandpa Dan).   And then…  my kids were suddenly hell bent on being the parent I apparently never was.    No repeating my mistakes,  no stressing over mismatched socks or broken curfews, no serving up fish sticks and jellied salad. 

Four of the kids kids

The more they realized just how inadequate I was as a parent, the more they  realized that it was I who was responsible for every bad decision they had ever made and every challenge that life had  ever presented.  Good times!

To be honest – they all turned out to be responsible adults and really good parents who do their best to be the best parent their kids could have.  But, these last years have hardly been living the dream family wise.

The good news is that things are improving.  I am on good terms with one son and my daughter – and with their families and significant others.   Unfortunately, my family is a work in progress,  but here’s hoping and praying.  

Happy Mother’s Day!

19 thoughts on “Happy Mother’s Day”

  5. Happy Mother’s Day, Anne Marie! Thank you for sharing these wonderful photos and memories. You are very blessed, and no family is perfect. My son wants nothing to do with me, I’ll spare you the details. God bless you and your family!

    On another note, I noticed that you don’t always use the letter U in certain words. Have the incorrect American spellings creeped into Canada? I hope not! 😂

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  6. Thank you, John. I am sorry about your fractured relationship with your son. Families are just too complicated these days. 💞

    It must just depend on the word. I hadn’t really noticed. 🤔

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  7. Thanks, Anne Marie. It’s painful isn’t it. I love the many differences between American English as spoken and written. Americans, Canadians, British and the Aussies have their different ways of speaking our common language that I love so much. Have a wonderful new week, mom. (you get it of course). ☺️

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  10. Loved hearing more about your family and seeing the pictures of everyone, Anne. Alone with three kids and two full time jobs my goodness! You were and are a rock star! I agree it takes time for us all to see the big picture sometimes through a different lens. With time and much love anything is possible.
    So grateful to you coming into my life! Every day you are my rock showing up and getting it done and encouraging me and loving me on my path.
    I hope you had a wonderful Mother’s Day!

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  11. Loved reading this Anne and the pictures are just precious! My oldest still will bring up a couple things I did and say it was wrong and that shows she’s still mad about it. Haven’t heard about that in a year or so so maybe there’s been some maturity and growth there. She won’t fully understand until she matures more or becomes a mom of a child with similar situations. I’m so happy for where you all are now! You brighten up my days and motivate the hell out of me! Hope your Mother’s Day was great! ❤️

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  13. Thank you, Dwight! It was a good day! Jen & Maddy, Genie & Alec all came by. Danny called me
    And Amanda and the boys sent me Snap Chat greetings so it was really nice. Dan and I got me flowers, Maddy brought me chocolates and Genie & Alec brought me flowers for the yard. 💞

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  14. It was really nice! My favourite moment was last night when Jen called me from work after Genie gave her, her present. When I was cleaning out cupboards this week I found a little vintage teapot and cups. I sent Jen a photo and she said how much she had always loved it. I gave it to the girls when they came for supper on Tuesday and told them they could buy her a box of her favourite tea (she drinks a lot of tea) and wrap it up nice with the tea set. She was so happy to get it, she cried – at work. 😂. Genie also got her a Lily, which is her favourite flower. 😊

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