Like most parents, I thought I had a pretty decent concept of parenting while my kids were ‘kids’. The one area where I really struggled was my tendency to worry about them, much like my Mother worried about my siblings and I, and her Mother worried about her and her siblings. It is a Mother thing that is harder to overcome than most mother things, as I mentioned in a September 2020 blog post.
My sons and my daughter are now in their fabulous forties and amazingly I have my maternal worrying somewhat under control.
It is funny how young parents worry about the terrible two’s and the terrifying teen’s. Those were too easy. Toddlers are adorable – regardless of where they are stuffing the marachino cherries and grilled cheese sandwiches. Teens are a hoot – a constant source of amusement and delightful drama.
I won’t deny it. The forties are ugly. (My mother definitely worried as I approached mine!)
I have one son who seems to be dealing fairly well – he keeps busy and has an amazing wife and family. His twenties were seriously trying, but he seems to be handling the forties.
The other son is well into his forties. He has made a lot of changes in his life in the past few years. It remains to be seen how they will go for him.
I manage to forgo the worrying for both of my sons these days, and just send them warm and fuzzy feelings on a regular basis.
I still tend to worry about my daughter (and her family). I know that is not good. Just as Jennifer is responsible for her family, for the decisions she has made and for the consequences of her decisions, I am responsible for my own mental health and well being. I am responsible for creating a happy, peaceful home for myself and my husband. I am responsible for living my best life. I raised all of my kids to the best of my abilities. There comes a time to let go and trust that they have whatever it takes to live their own best lives.
So, there you have it. As a mother, I still worry – but I am gradually getting better and I am getting better about holding myself accountable.
That’s it for today. Take care and have a great day!💞