Own It

by annemariedemyen, posted in career, life

I have been working for over five decades now and have decided to share some thoughts on problem resolution in the workplace (or in life in general). There seems to be a need these days🙂

The most successful and effective people I have known are the ones who recognize an issue, give it some serious consideration, and deal with it.

There are several ineffective ways to deal with an issue and I am pretty sure I have seen them all.

1. Blame someone else – This does nothing to address the issue and abdicates any power one has to deal with the issue. If you are absolutely responsible for causing an issue and you try to blame others, it will be obvious. 😐

2. Make excuses – Nobody cares and it does not resolve the issue. You may have to explain how the issue arose but that must be followed by a resolution or at least a commitment to find a resolution to the issue. 👍

3. Ignore the issue and expect it to go away. If it is your issue to address, it will not go away. It certainly will not go away without causing further damage. If there is truly nothing you can do to address an issue, you can still choose an effective way to react to it. 🙂

4. Allowing yourself to be the helpless victim. It is all there. Victims are helpless. Even if you were totally innocent and have been hurt deliberately in the worst possible way by someone, do not allow yourself to be victimized. Even if the only thing you can do is work on resolving your own pain and suffering, do that. If you wait for someone else to resolve a situation or repair the damage it has done to you, it will never happen.

Acting the helpless victim at work is particularly non-helpful. Employers, employees, co-workers, customers, suppliers and other business contacts are looking for you to be competent and effective. If you are looking to succeed in your position, that is the face you need to show. 🙂

5. Lie, cheat or steal. Any negative response to an issue is not going to have a positive result – ever! 🙁

6. Act oblivious and clueless. Seriously, is that how you want people to see you? If you want to be treated as a professional, act like one. 🤔

7. Scream, swear, throw things, kick things. None are mature. None are helpful. None are professional. 🤯

8. Avoid the issue. If there is work to be done, or an issue to be addressed just do it. This is not the time to take a week off.

One final thought. Accept that some situations are hopeless. If there are ongoing issues that you do not have the power or authority to deal with, work towards a viable exit plan. There are options but think them through and ensure you are not leaving one bad situation for another.

Top Stories of 2019

by annemariedemyen, posted in life, Uncategorized
Happy New Year

Tonight I watched the news with my husband. I generally avoid watching our news as it tends to focus on politicians, social issues that are never resolved and news that never happened. Our newscasters once interviewed a golfer who did not get hit by lightning during a storm. That was special. We also heard of Regina’s connection to the Concord that crashed years ago. Fyi – there was no connection. That was the story. 🙄

One of our news segments tonight was looking back at the top five news stories in Saskatchewan in 2019. I do not know who chose these stories but for what it is worth, here we go.

1. Fighting the federal carbon tax. For the record, our premier argues against anything the federal government proposes. Personally, if the carbon tax cost us anything this past year, it was not noticeable and we got a rebate of about $750.00 on our taxes last year to cover it. We spent it on a new patio set.

FYI we have a real patio – the grandkid’s pool is on it🙄

2. Federal Election. It was painful to watch but ultimately hardly newsworthy.

3. Saskatchewan farmers terrible season. I don’t remember a year when that one did not make the top five news stories for the year.

4. Regina Bypass Opens. Government spends billions to solve a problem that could have been solved with a couple of traffic lights – but it would not have been nearly as impressive. 🤷

5. Mac the Moose from Moose Jaw received a new rack to regain his title as tallest moose in the world after a moose sculpture from Norway took him down.

Personally, I would not have rated all, or probably any, of these stories as top newsmakers in 2019. Regardless, I do think these choices reveal something. In Saskatchewan we are blessed. We see news from around the globe – news of devastating floods, fires, famine and violence and it is unimaginable to us .

In Saskatchewan, we have social issues and there are personal tragedies that affect families and communities, but as a whole, we live in relative peace and security. That should be noted this year and every year – noted and appreciated.

Happy New Year

by annemariedemyen, posted in life

Wishing everyone a Happy New Year and all the best for this brand new decade. No one knows what lays before us but I have never felt better about a decade. Good, bad or ugly, whatever 2020 and the next decade throws at us, I know I am ready. I honestly feel strong and confident enough to handle whatever comes our way. 🕊️

The Care Bears are Coming to Our Town

by annemariedemyen, posted in family, Social Issues
Genie at the Wheel

Fifteen years ago we bought our granddaughter a pink ride on car that played an annoying little Care Bear song. Genie loved that car and rode it non-stop for two summers. She obviously had her mother’s love for being at the wheel – and her questionable taste in music 😂. Six months ago, at fifteen and a half, Genie got her learners license and bought her mother’s mini van. Yesterday, less than a week after her sixteenth birthday, Genie went through her driver’s test and passed on her first try. 👍

Having her license, and her own vehicle, will be a good thing in a lot of ways. Genie will be able to drive herself and her younger brother, Rory, to highschool. She will be able to drive herself to work. She will be able to run errands and take her little sisters places they need to go. She will have the freedom to take herself places that may not otherwise be accessible to her. It will be an asset on future resumes. There are a lot of positives.

Of course, this independence comes with a lot of responsibility and concern for those of us who love her. When Genie gets upset, she walks or rides her bike – for miles. She can go so much farther, so much faster, with real wheels beneath her. Will she drive when she is upset? There are other less responsible and less kind teenagers that do not have a vehicle or their license yet. Will they take advantage of our sweet little girl who has worked so hard for what she has? Then of course, we live in Saskatchewan. For the better part of each year, our roads are covered with ice and snow and our dark of night extends long into what should be daylight hours. Driving is challenging for experienced drivers, how dangerous will it be for our newbie? Finally, Genie will be sharing the road with a host of other drivers, some who should not be behind the wheel of a vehicle. Will she have the skill to avoid them?

There are some steps to independence and adulthood that are more notable and daunting for teenagers and those of us who love them. This is a big one. Fortunately, we know Genie is responsible. We know she will not abuse this privilege or take this responsibility lightly. Still, we hear echoes of the Care Bear song and suddenly she is our innocent, vulnerable, baby girl again. 😲

Then💖
And Now💖

Christmas 2.0

by annemariedemyen, posted in family

We had the sons over tonight for a belated Christmas. Unfortunately, Mark’s Erin couldn’t be here as she had to work and Danny’s daughter Gabby is with her mother for Christmas. Mark was here with Dominic and Danny was here with Amanda and their boys Lucas and Cason.

Lucas, Cason, Bacardi and Dominic

The boys kept busy with cars and Lego. There were a few pillow fights and a little mayhem. It’s a small house so a little mayhem goes a long way😂

Dominic and Lucas, who are both four years old, did great having their first supper at the big kid table.
Cason loved the cardboard box🤷
The adults were more into the chocolate

We had a good laid back visit. Spaghetti and hot wings might become our go to Christmas dinner. All in all an entertaining evening.

Dan is finally off work now for a few days so we get to relax with the dogs for a couple of hours. Nice🙂

Baccardi and Cornelius

Round Two

by annemariedemyen, posted in family
Kat & Company

Getting ready to settle in for the second night of sharing my bed with three dogs. We made it through last night. I am not sure how this will work tomorrow night when Dan is home. I might regret convincing him to get rid of the king-size bed we had. 🤷

Christmas Tradition

by annemariedemyen, posted in family
Done👍

Finished my Christmas jigsaw puzzle. Actually I got a box of eight smaller puzzles this year but with Danny and family coming tomorrow I may not get them all done before January 2nd.

Growing up, we were not wealthy by any means but all the stops came out at Christmas. There were chocolates and candy, nuts and oranges. There were endless buns and pies, cookies and squares. There was turkey and ham, cabbage rolls and tourtiere, salads and a dozen side dishes. My mother was a phenomenal and prolific cook and baker! There were stockings filled with small treats and toys, always including a new coloring book and crayons. There were dolls, and teddy bears and trucks under the tree. Last but not least, there was always a new jigsaw puzzle. After Christmas dinner, the card table was set up, the puzzle came out, and we all took turns visiting around the puzzle, doing a bit here and a bit there, until the family puzzle was complete. It is a tradition I am sure we all maintained with our children and they carry it on today. 🎄

Maddy’s Annual Boxing Day Sleepover

by annemariedemyen, posted in family

Nine years ago we were blessed with the happiest little granddaughter we could possibly hope for. Madison came into the world smiling and has made it her mission in life to spread joy.



Maddy💖

We did not see Maddy cry until she was three years old and even then it was the most hilarious meltdown in the history of panty shopping. Apparently even if the panties were the right size, perfect color and had her favourite cartoon character on them, it was a dealbreaker if they did not come in a sealed plastic package. Lack of proper packaging had Maddy sitting in the aisle, sobbing her heart out. 😂. Maddy always has a plan, and perfect execution is everything. 🤣

Maddy’s Favourite Flowers of Course Because She Is Our Sunshine

One of Maddy’s favourite things is sleepovers with Grandma and Grandpa. A few years ago we were going through a particularly hectic December, here and at their home, so sleepovers were put on hold. I promised a disappointed Maddy that we would have a sleepover for Boxing Day. She was more excited about her upcoming special Boxing Day Sleepover than she was about Christmas. 😂 She had a plan and this was going to be spectacular. Boxing Day was finally upon us and Maddy was ready. I picked her up, we made a quick shopping run, came home to arts and crafts, had a special Maddy planned supper, read a few books, had a long bubble bath with lots of toys and capped it all off with brunch the next morning. Thus began Maddy’s Annual Boxing Day Sleepover.

By the next Boxing Day, Maddy had recruited her little sister Prim so we had twice the fun for our annual event.

Last year there may have been a few bumps in the road😂

This year there is no Maddy’s Annual Boxing Day Sleepover but we will be thinking of her and hoping that her eyes are twinkling, she has an ear to ear smile and she is having a very special Boxing Day

Happy Boxing Day Maddy💖

Christmas Miracles

by annemariedemyen, posted in Uncategorized
Merry Christmas From Our Home To Yours

I grew up in a French Catholic home. Religion was a part of our lives every day but even more so at Christmas. For weeks before Christmas, we were put into super drive preparing for the big day. We scrubbed our home from top to bottom, cooked and baked, shopped and wrapped, we prepared for our school Christmas concert (which centred around the Nativity story in those day), we decorated our home and of course we attended choir practice and church services six ways to Sunday. My older, married sisters would arrive with husbands and children and gifts.

By the big day, we were ready for the MIRACLE OF CHRISTMAS🎁🎄🎆

And then, my mother would crash and burn. The exhaustion and the stress of weeks of preparation, topped off with a couple of hours at midnight mass, would finally get the best of her. By noon, Mother would be in full meltdown, babies would start to cry, men would start to drink, sisters would start to fight. No Christmas miracles in our home, just bitter disappointment and the obligatory Christmas pictures to prove that we had the happiest of times🙄. By supper, we had all thrown in the towel and spent the evening working at jigsaw puzzles and playing cards.

Once I had my own family, I pretty much carried on the same tradition with a few extra perks thrown in. Christmas in our home was never done until someone had the flu or a case of pneumonia. The epitome had to be the year Danny puked on the Christmas tree. That was a classic. The year my Dad died days before Christmas was memorable. I was almost ready to give up on the MIRACLE OF CHRISTMAS by 2003. That was the year our precious Genie was born. We left the hospital at 3:30pm on Christmas Eve with love and joy in our hearts. We were so close. We got home to find that my Mother had decided to place a box of chocolates under the Christmas tree, inspite of our asking her repeatedly not to do that, inspite of our moving them sixteen times. She had no idea our dog would eat them. Good grief! What dog wouldn’t eat them? Really hard to hold onto the Christmas spirit, when you are sitting in the vet’s office on Christmas Eve. 🤦

My family grew up, in spite of our annual Christmas debacles. They all have children of their own and their own Christmas stories to tell. For many years we have been going to my daughter’s for Christmas. I have powered through shopping for gifts and food, while my husband kept a running total of the cost. I went to Christmas concerts, which always seem to be held on December 17th 😢. My daughter would bake and clean. We were always ready for a CHRISTMAS MIRACLE that never quite made it. There was tears, disappointment, arguments, melt downs, way to much noise and just downright unChristmassy behaviour – but we kept powering through and I kept doing my damnedest to aim for a CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.

This year my sons are with their in-laws, my husband is at work, my daughter is at her home with her family and we are not there because she has shut me out of her life and banned me from seeing my grandchildren. My father and mother are both gone. I am alone for Christmas Day. I went into this season with no expectations or hope of making this the year of the CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.

Honestly, I am having the best Christmas ever. My sister and her husband were here for an overnight visit a few days ago. We sent out for pizza and had wine. So nice. My sons are coming with their families on the weekend. I have done a bit of baking – some good, some not so much, but whatever. It was Christmassy. Genie’s stepfather dropped her off for a quick visit on the 23rd. She brought us some gifts she had made for us. There were a lot of tears but it was all good. I cooked a ham last night, destroyed the scalloped potatoes but the broccoli was great. After supper, we opened presents. We cried over Genie’s. They were so special. She painted us a picture and wrote a book for Grandpa, telling him how much he meant to her. She gave me a sparkling elephant pin. Today I made myself Pillsbury cinnamon buns for breakfast. I have a turkey in the oven for when Dan gets home from work. I am relaxing by my new fireplace, ready to start doing a jigsaw puzzle. I am happy, at peace, and full of love and good wishes for my family – all of my family. I feel really good. This is is the year of my CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.

The thing is, you can’t make miracles happen. You can’t force them or fake them. Miracles just happen when you let them🕊️