Tag: peace

Day 10 – My Time Within….

by annemariedemyen, posted in Uncategorized

I am ten days into my June ‘Accentuate the Positive’ challenge and it is time to go a bit deeper. Today’s post is a peek into my soul, spirit, inner-being exercise routine. Meditation my way. 💞

Through the years, I have made several attempts to start meditating. I was too busy running in circles to slow down long enough to get far with my efforts, so they inevitably petered out.

Last year, after I retired, I took a lot of long walks with Kat. What started as a means to strengthen my respiratory system and take a few pounds off my pooch became so much more. I reached a place of peace and tranquility that I had never experienced before. It was a place where meditation came easily.

At some point I discovered a world of meditation on YouTube. For me, it was meditation made simple! There are videos available for guided meditations, chants from indigenous and religious persuasions, music to meditate by, and more.

The following are a few of the meditations that I have found particularly helpful and effective for me. If you have never meditated before , I suggest you note the following:

1. Never listen to these videos, or any meditation videos or audios, when driving or in an any situation where you need to be awake, alert, or cognisant.

2. I recommend using headphones or earbuds for maximum effect of any of these meditations.

3. These videos are ones that I would recommend trying because they work for me. They may not work for you, but I hope that does not discourage you from searching for something that does. I believe that our spiritual, inner-being, or soul well-being is as important as our physical and our mental health.

4. Meditation does not replace professional medical, psychiatric, or psychological care. Consult your professionals if you are at all concerned that meditating could affect any condition affecting you or any treatment that you are undergoing.

5. These videos may occasionally make you uncomfortable, especially if have very strong religious or anti-religious beliefs. Personally, I find I can easily ignore any momentary discomfort caused and in some cases I have come to realize that I have unconscious beliefs that I am quite happy to rid myself of.

This last meditation, is the one that I found the most challenging for me. As I was listening, I had a flash of memory from my childhood. I grew up in the Catholic Church and attended mass frequently – Sundays, holidays, funerals, weddings and on random weekdays. Like myself, the church has changed along the way. Back sixty-some years ago, there was a place in the Mass when everyone struck their chest three times and each time professed “I’m not worthy…I’m not worthy…I’m not worthy”. That was harsh! It bothered me then and now I find it totally bizarre. Who and why would anyone ever think this was reasonable or rational? Why would any creator place us in a world of trees, flowers, mountains, oceans, skies, and sunshine if we were supposed to feel unworthy? What is more, why would I keep anything so wierd tucked into a dusty corner of my mind? I am glad I dug it out and seriously questioned it. I am glad that this meditation made me feel uncomfortable. For me, it worked. I feel worthy and I wholeheartedly believe we all should! If there was no hope, why would we even strive to be better?

That is it for today. One third of my challenge down, two thirds to go. 😊

Have a nice day and I hope to see you tomorrow! 💞

Day 3 – The Wanderer

by annemariedemyen, posted in nature

Some days, I just have to walk off the negative before I can find the positive. 🤷 For the third day of my June ‘Accentuate the Positive’ challenge, I decided to share some of the paths I have wandered and enjoyed over the years.

Following the meandering paths at the University of Alberta Botanic Gardens just outside of Edmonton, Alberta
A couple of granddaughters heading off the beaten path in Wascana Park.
Our garden path – I love this path – started by me, helped along by my daughter, and finished by Dan! It seemed like a simple project going in. 🙄
Following the path through a golf course in southern Saskatchewan
Dan and Kat wandering the Wascana Trails north of Regina (we carry a little leather bag for Kat’s essentials – water, snacks, extra poo bags).
A shaded path though Wascana Park.
Paths converging in Assiniboine Park in Winnipeg, Mb. – I love Winnipeg💖
My favourite path – a secluded, winding path through Patricia Park 🤗

Three days down, twenty seven to go! Have a beautiful day and I hope to see you tomorrow! 💞

Finding Myself

by annemariedemyen, posted in life

Back in the day (my day), people went to great lengths searching to ‘find themselves’. 

I loved and admired my father.  If I ever envied him, it was because he never had to ‘find’ himself.  He knew who he was, and he was who he was, regardless of who he may have been dealing with at any particular time.   

My father was a very quiet, peaceful man. I spent a lot of time with him and I  remember him losing his temper with someone else ONCE!    My parents owned a service station/autobody shop.  My siblings and I pumped gas from the time we could reach the gas nozzle.   One day, my father was busy in the back of the shop when a customer pulled in.  He was a big man (at least 6′-6″ and 250 lbs).  He owned one of the most successful retail businesses in town and was no doubt on the town council and Chamber of Commerce.    I ran out to pump his gas.  I was tiny, probably about six years old.  This big man got out of his vehicle, stepped around it, and stood behind me.  I did not notice he had a lit cigarette in his hand.  My father stepped out of the shop.  He noticed!   He yelled at the man to get away from me and he went up one side of him and down the other for half a block.  My father was 4′-10″  and 130lbs.   If I had not been so shocked at his outburst, I would probably have found the entire incident hysterically funny.  The customer obviously did not, but I never saw him smoke another cigarette in his life. He did remain a loyal customer.

At the other end of the spectrum, my class was making graduation plans.  We had to choose a business person to make a toast to the graduating class.   I was surprised when one of my classmates nominated my father.  When I asked why, he said because my father treated everyone in town with the same respect and consideration – everyone including the teenagers in my class.  It did not matter to my father who you were, he knew who he was, and he acted accordingly. 

I was not like my father when it came to knowing and being myself.  I blame him.  😂    To the very end, on his deathbed and while I was pushing forty, my father would introduce me as ‘our baby’.  To be fair, six kids in,  he probably forgot my name by the time the ink dried on my birth certificate. 

During this past year of seclusion, or reclusion as the case may be, I have been ‘finding myself’.  I have found myself, learned to like and accept myself.  

The interesting part of this journey, is that while I have been finding myself, I have learned to accept others as they are.  They do not have to agree with me or validate my views, and I can accept them as they are and respect their views – even if I disagree with them. 

I don’t know if this is a new level of maturity or self confidence, but I am in a good place. A peaceful place. I am ready to quit searching and just be – me!

Yea, I got my first Covid vaccine shot today!

Have a nice day and stay safe! 💞

Patience

by annemariedemyen, posted in life

I have struggled for years to overcome stress and anxiety. In the past couple of years, I have turned things around and have learned to focus on living a life of inner peace.  This has made all the difference in the world.   My life has become so much easier and better in so many ways!

I have, for the most part, learned to appreciate the NOW.  This present moment.  I have released the pain and grief of the the past.  I have released the fear of the future.   I do my best to make each day, hour, each moment a peaceful oasis. 

One of the aspects of this new lifestyle is a tendency to be far more positive and hopeful than I have ever been.  Now is good, so I know that there are even better days to come!

With this positivity, a new devil is spawned.   My patience is being sorely tested as never before!  One cannot be truly at peace NOW when one is totally focussed on the future – regardless of how bright and beautiful that future may be.

Today I awoke to a new cactus blossom. It is spectacular, if only for today. I checked on my little seedlings and they are growing larger and stronger by the day. I watched Kat bounce out to the yard to chase the birds and harrass the squirrels.

It is a good day! It is a great day! But wait…. Soon the the grass will turn green, the trees will leaf out, our garden will thrive, flowers will bloom and temperatures will soar. We will spend countless hours outside. Days will be spent walking Kat along meandering paths and floating in our pool. Evenings will be spent barbecuing on our patio and sipping wine as we relax on our deck chairs.

But we have to wait. 🤦 We have to appreciate today. And we have to be patient. Summer will get here – eventually!

Summer days to come💞

Living at the Speed of Life

by annemariedemyen, posted in life

There have been a lot of changes in my life since I retired a few months ago.  The majority of those changes have been within me – changes in attitude, changes in personality, changes in relationships.

One of the relationships that has changed most drastically is my relationship with time.   Time is still a significant, relevant part of my life.  I still have clocks in my house and, as much as my daily regular schedule has changed, it has changed to a new regular schedule.  

The thing is, before retirement time was one of my main sources of stress and frustration.   Hours in a classroom lasted longer than days during summer break.   Nine months of pregnancy lasted forever!  Years of infants, toddlers, tots,  and teens were  over way too soon.  A week at the office was interminable.  A weekend home was never long enough. The terrible years were endless and the good ones flew by.  There was no consistently to time – ever – and I never had time when I needed it most!

In retirement, time flows easily and smoothly.   I never feel suspended in time, nor do I feel pressured to do more than time allows.  Time passes –  the hours, the days, the weeks, the months – regularly and consistently and reassuringly.   Regardless of all that is or is not happening, time passes.   No longer a sources of stress or frustration, time is now a comforting measure of life.

Happy New Year 2021!

by annemariedemyen, posted in family

It is finally here!! – a brand new year with bright new hopes and dreams. 🥂🎉

Back in the day, I would be spending this day making my list of New Year’s resolutions. Most of them would be long forgotten by mid-March. A few years ago, I changed gears and chose a new ‘focus’ for each new year. Last year my focus was on peace and I have to admit that will be a hard one to beat. Going forward, I will definitely keep ‘peace’ a priority but for this year of 2021, I have decided to make ‘BEAUTY’ my focus.

During the summer of 2020, I spent a LOT of time outside – enjoying nature as I hadn’t for decades. On the days when the sun was shining, the grass was green, the flowers were blooming, the sky was blue and the birds were singing, the beauty of our world was easy to immerse oneself in. What really surprised me was that, on the gloomy and dreary days, it was even more heartlifting to find a tiny beautiful treasure to appreciate – be it a wildflower, a leaf, a perfect raindrop, or a baby’s smile. That is what convinced me that a year focussed on beauty, would make for a memorable year.

Today, I am fortunate to be able to share a family moment to kick off my year of beauty – and beautiful it was.

Yesterday afternoon, son Dan married Amanda, the love of his life – the woman of his dreams. More than a basic joining two hearts, it was the official joining of two families – a yours, mine, and ours celebration💞 Even in the midst of a pandemic, with a very limited ‘live’ attendance this group made it an amazing event, while family and friends joined them via technology.

Live from the basement of the happy bride and groom. Gabby with Cason, Cori-Lynn (friend), Amanda, officiate, Dan, Lucas and Gregg (friend). Dan made the floral arch, while Amanda had a big hand in the rest of the decor.
The wedding cake – Dan made his amazing sour cream German chocolate cake (2 sections – 4 layers each) and mounted it on the wood base. Amanda decorated it with her typical talent and understated, humerous, flair!

This group does nothing half-way. They feed off of each other’s abundant, positive energy to make everyday a celebration. I was concerned about how well they would make out in a slowed down pandemic year like 2020, but they made the most of it – as always!

To the happy couple, the beautiful family and to all – Happy New Year!

Goodbye 2020

by annemariedemyen, posted in life

This year is winding down. For all of the challenges of 2020, people are excited for all of the possibilities of 2021. I guess that is human nature!

In 2020, I made peace my priority. In a difficult year, this priority served me amazingly well. It brought me into retirement. It allowed me time for walking miles and miles around our neighbourhood with our little dog, Kat. It brought me hours of relaxing in our yard this summer. It led me to a new and inspirational journey within, through meditation. It provided me with countless hours spent with my husband – a luxury after years of Monday thru Friday/ eight to four-thirty while Dan worked twenty-four/seven shifts. In half an hour, it will see us relaxing in the comfort of our own livingroom while we watch son Dan and his soon to be wife Amanda marry in their own home – hours away from us. Once again, in this year of pandemic, we are grateful for technology!

My path to peace in 2020 💞

All the best as you ring out the old and wishing you a beautiful 2021! 🥂

Why???

by annemariedemyen, posted in life

It takes a bit of effort to get there and stay there, but living peacefully is nice. In my mind, it is the easiest, happiest, most fulfilling, and most productive way to live. All good things come through peace. 🙂

So… Why are so many people in the world today hellbent on being miserable, confrontational, and angry? This isn’t just a one situation thing, it appears to be the norm in so many situations.

1. Politics – Someone devotes years and fortunes to becoming a political ‘leader’. They make it to the top, are given the reigns of power to do good for a city, province, or country. What do they do? They waste their time and power fighting the ‘next’ election and attacking other political leaders. They are angry, miserable and unproductive and they encourage their supporters to be angry, miserable, and unproductive. Why? Is that what they were elected to office for? Should it get them re-elected? 🤷

2. Corporations and their employees – Most people spend countless hours of their lives working. A lot of these people spend way too much time battling with co-workers. Even the professional associations (unions, small business associations, large business groups) spend more time creating and encouraging problems between company departments and the people in them, than they do working to resolve problems. Why? Corporations cannot possibly thrive if no one is willing to work together, and yet it is a problem in virtually every corporation. 🤷

3. Families – There was a time when families stuck together. Most families – most of the time. Now days it takes nothing to shatter and destroy a family. Even families that are relatively unbroken can be made miserable by those members who are incapable of being reasonable and pleasant. There are so many people who go through life so busy looking for a battle that they cannot even get along with those who they should be closest to. Why? Your family should be your support system. You should be supportive of those in your family. 🤷

4. Society in General – In this day and age, why are there so many people who cannot seem to co-exist peacefully with others? There is a new protest every day. There are new radical groups every day, pushing for their rights and only their rights. There are groups formed for the sole purpose of being miserable. We had one guy here who started a Facebook page dedicated to posting photos of poor parking, to shame the ‘offending parkers’. He wanted people to get up every day and deliberately look for something that would annoy them. 🤦. Another group, I encounter frequently on social media lately, are those who demand the right to be offensive and they attack anyone who is offended by them. 😂. Why? Why do so many people want to be so miserable, for the sake of being miserable?

I cannot imagine why so many people invest so much time and effort into being angry, indignant, bitter and the like. I cannot imagine what they get out of it. I cannot imagine what they think the payoff is for them – happiness, love, prosperity, health? Peace? 🙄

Taking Retirement to a New Level

by annemariedemyen, posted in retirement

My concept of retirement continues to evolve…. When I was still working, I thought of retirement as the release from responsibility, doing always for others, and putting up with the constant BS and pressure that is the working world. As retirement came closer, I saw it as an opportunity to live life on my terms – and I was determined to keep it busy and fulfilling. After I retired, I gradually mellowed out and decided that retirement was an opportunity to enjoy and appreciate the opportunity to just ‘be’ – truly living my life each day on my own terms. For the past few weeks, with health problems becoming more and more of an issue despite my best efforts, I was floundering a bit – not sure where retirement was taking me.

Now, I am back on track and feel that I have, for probably the first time in my life, found my true calling. Regardless of all else happening in my life, going forward I am totally committed to channeling peace and hope and love and beauty. I think that is what the world needs right now that it is the best way that I can make the most of my retirement.

This mission of mine takes little effort. I can do it regardless of how I am feeling or what I am doing. I can do it when I am walking, cooking, cleaning, reading, shopping, driving, meditating – anything! It is that easy. It takes nothing out of me, I feel good doing it and I feel I am doing something truly worthwhile with my life.

I have never understood why some people deliberately channel so much hate, anger, greed and fear into the world. That takes so much effort and it makes the world so ugly and miserable. I cannot imagine what it does to people who do it on a regular basis.

So, yes that is my plan for retirement going forward – peace, hope, love, and beauty.

Have a great day!

More Lessons (finally) Learned ðŸ¤¦

by annemariedemyen, posted in life

It is so strange that we can hear the same truth repeated over and over in our lives and never really understand the meaning or importance of the message.

I was raised in a relatively loving home. The Catholic Church and her teaching were a foundation of our lives. I have read countless books on self improvement. Through all of my life, the concept of forgiveness and unconditional love has been brought forth time and time again. I thought I ‘got it’.

I have tried to be a good, caring person. I have tried to not be angry or hateful towards others. I have tried to not be vengeful or judgemental. I honestly thought I had a fairly good grasp on living a ‘good’ life.

Early this spring, I developed health issues that seriously impaired my life. I was driven to retire from my job (a few months earlier than planned) and to start living a healthier life. As part of my healing, I began walking – a lot! – on a regular basis. My walks gave me time to think and many of my thoughts focussed on peace. (Which coincidentally was the subject I had chosen to focus on in 2020).

Walking in itself did wonders for easing my stress level. Spending time in nature on a regular basis was relaxing and beneficial. I walked for my peace. I walked for my family’s peace. I walked for peace for friends and neighbours and strangers. While my health was my initial reason for walking, peace was the driving force that kept me going.

These past few days, while I still walked every day and enjoyed my time in nature, I have started to struggle to stay focussed on peace. There have been a number of things happening that I have been dealing with – ongoing issues with my daughter, my son’s upcoming wedding (which will involve spending a couple of days socializing with my ex-husband and his family), politics – specifically a provincial election which will once again result in a landslide win for a party led by people who have caused serious grief and pain to many – including my family, and with colder weather moving in, a return to having my husband watching his television programs in the livingroom. (I love my husband and I certainly want him to be comfortable on his days off, but personally I am uncomfortable with television programs the likes of Jerry Springer in our house).

All of these situations have cost me a lot of peace. I ‘block’ one disturbing thing out of my consciousness and three more things gnaw at me. It has become increasingly frustrating.

FINALLY I get it!

Peace is one of those things that you cannot just have and hoard. You cannot have peace and choose to share it with some, while withholding it from others. You do not get to decide who is worthy of peace.

For the last couple of days, I have been walking for peace – for myself, for my family, for friends and neighbours and strangers – but including and specifically for those who I had been previously trying to block from my peaceful consciousness.

I feel so much better. The more I walk for peace for myself and others, including walking for those who challenge my peace, the more peaceful I become. Seriously – how simple is that? 🤷